I’ll do my best to not bore you with clichés of growing older and wiser. I’m not sure I’ve ever been wise, and the more I grow old, the more I feel that’s the god’s honest truth and not me being modest. Every not and then, though, you have to sit back and realize that what you’re doing is not working. I turn 36 this year, and I’m honestly about 10 years past, realizing that the shit I’m doing isn’t working. No time like the present huh?
Since April of last year (2017) I’ve been fighting a herniated disk in my lower back. At first I just assumed I had something pinching a nerve and would rectify it via chiropractor appointments, as I had done in the past. After 6 months of no relief, I did the normal doctor checkup and found out I had a “Significant herniated disk”. It’s now been another 5 months, and I’ve gone through 3 steroid shots in my back, with no real change in my condition. Basically it all hurts. I have problems getting my own socks and shoes on in the morning, I can’t sit for too long, I cant stand for too long, and being up walking around sucks. A trip to the surgeon led me no where. The cherry on top came on the 26th of February when the surgeon informed me he didn’t feel comfortable operating n me because of my size. #Fail
During all the doctors visits, I got more lovely news. I got pegged with the good ole diabetes. I know, I know,… “Well look at you, you fat fuck…”. While it may seem obvious that I would be a prime candidate, It’s never really been an issue for me. I actually eat fairly healthy foods on a regular basis. I love fruits, veggies and all the things most people don’t. It’s the bored eating that gets me. I had been tested twice before for diabetes and was very smug about the findings. I had planned on being smug about the ones this past year too, but alas, #fail.
So where does this leave me? I guess it’s that crossroads people hit when they change their life around and submit their story for a Lifetime movie. I got a lot of shit to do before I get to that point. On top of all of this, I think it’s time I seriously think about talking to someone about my anxiety and depression. Get some professional help. It’s crippling at times and I feel if I can get a grasp on it, it’ll help the drive for everything else.
Monday is my day one in making changes. Calorie limit, no more pop, meal prepping, and more. The no more pop and calorie limit will be the main goal for the first week. Move things in after. I’ll try and formulate a complete plan of attack and update the blog when I have it.
If you want to follow along with me, I’m going to start doing daily updates via Instagram ( psaprez ) . So follow me over there. I’ll also be trying to post more pictures of the family n my main account. I’ll also be updating on projects I’m working on over the course of the year. Here is to hoping for a happy healthier life for everyone.
